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Does My Bum Look Big In This?
Never ask my husband if you want an honest opinion! Your view about yourself is what matters most.In all seriousness though, how do you see yourself? After having a baby its not easy to bounce back, sometimes, we never go back to where we were. As women where do we get our approval from? Our validation that we do look OK? From our husbands? Our friends? Strangers even?
And how do you rate yourself? Is it based on how you feel? Your dress size? Stretch marks? Do you compare yourself? Or perhaps other people compare you?
We all know the media plays a huge role in making many of us feel bad or guilty about the way we look. It does not help when there are pictures of celebs looking fitter and more fabulous 4 weeks after having a baby than they did before. We know they have personal trainers and sometimes chefs and nannies, they probably poured themselves into a pair of Spanx and have forgone breastfeeding their children to look like this, but we still compare. Even though we know it’s a requirement of their career to look fabulous, we still compare.
Funny thing is our self image, whether we want it to or not, is passed down to our children. From such a young age, it would seem school aged children are concerned about being fat, not looking good enough, not having the right hair.
As sad as this sounds, it is not the media giving our children the strongest message.
Think about the last time you looked in the mirror. What did you say? Did you look at how amazing your were? Were you grateful for your body or did you comment negatively about your weight, moan about your dress size or even comment about your saggy boobs? Hey don’t feel bad, I think at one time or another we have all been a little bit guilty of this.
When things really changed in my life…..especially with my health and weight, was the moment I accepted myself for the person I am, saggy bits and all. In fact once I did that, I stopped noticing my stretch marks, my tummy got flatter and I started to move more. As women we really need to stop being so critical of ourselves and of each other and once we can learn to love and accept ourselves for who we are, our children will model that behaviour instead!
The strength we gain from accepting ourselves is enormous. When you begin to accept yourself, your self belief grows. Your confidence level increases and things start to change for the better.
The next time you see your reflection or go to ask someone the old question – answer it yourself and find something good to build on.